Don’t be a poop, or how to stop being miserable
You know who they are. They are everywhere. They are the people who you live with or work with or come into contact with who are miserable.
You didn’t do a thing except say hello or answer the phone and there they are spewing all their miserableness onto you and ruining your day.
Let’s face it. Life can be tough and stressful. We all have things we need to do, and they may or may not be the things we actually want to do. Regardless, here we are getting it done and someone else comes along and fills our personal space with their negativity.
They complain. They whine about things that are really not their problem or business. They are very concerned that no one else get any more than they do, or work any less than they do. They are the ones that cry when they don’t get a cupcake, but complain about their thighs when they do nab that last cupcake.
I used to worry that I somehow had contributed to their bad days. I wondered what I had said that prompted such a nasty tone of voice, or caused them to bite my head off. I like to think that I have grown a bit in the last few years and now instead of thinking that I must somehow shoulder the blame, I have realized the truth.
They are miserable and will never be happy. And there is nothing I can do or not do to change that fact. Their attitude was in place before they happened upon me. They had already set their own miserable train of thought in motion. I just happened to step into their line of fire.
I used to think they would be easier to deal with if I could help them in some way. Answer their question well, or be cheerful around them, or just lend an ear. But I have learned that we are sponges for other people’s attitudes and by lending an ear or spending too much time with these toxic people, I was just letting the fumes invade my own heart.
I have learned to be better at protecting myself from these people. I have learned to walk away, let their words roll right off of me. And if I have to deal with someone like this, I try not to let their drama affect my day.
Still, I am amazed at the levels that people let their toxicity reach. Doesn’t it bother them to feel that miserable or angry or mean? If I snap at someone in a moment of anger, I carry the guilt for days. I am just not wired to feel grumpy and not be concerned with the impact of my interactions with others.
I have advice for those miserable folks.
Get over yourself.
Seriously. Get over it and move on.
If you hate your job, your relationship, where you live, how you spend your days so much that it is making you cranky and impossible to be around, move on. Get a new job, break up, move, find a hobby you enjoy… whatever it takes. But don’t let this misery manifest itself in your life another moment longer. And please don’t let it continue to rain down on everyone around you.
Life is short, people!
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