Catching Fireflies

finding magic along the way

The Best Answer to the Hardest Question

One of the hardest questions for me is always, “What do you want?” Every year, as Christmas and birthdays approach, I cringe at the thought of being asked this. Sometimes there is a book or CD that has been calling me, and there is always the standby gift card for a fabric shop. You can never go wrong there. But to come up with an idea every time? I just can’t do it!


I guess, this means I am blessed (which I am!) and content (which I try to be!) and happy (which I am always trying to define for myself). This is not a bad thing.

Every day I hear people around me wishing their lives away. The think they will be content and satisfied

when they lose 50 pounds
when they get the new job
when they find the right guy or girl
when their kids are finally out of the house
when they make a million dollars
when their divorce is final
when they finally get their degree
when they have more time to do something they love
when their lives quiet down/calm down/de-stress

I have news for you. Your life doesn’t begin then. Your life is happening now. And if you keep waiting until every little part of it falls into place to be happy, you are in for a life time of disappointment. Worse than that, you just might miss it completely.

Life is messy. It is full of starts, stops, attempts, failures, and mistakes. You have the option to react with anger, laughter, tears or to not react at all. But this is it – mess and all.

I wrote about birthdays a while back as my great-niece dove into her birthday party with unfettered enthusiasm. It struck me that so many women I know were dreading their birthdays, cringing at the thought of another year gone. I don’t think it is the wrinkles and graying hair that make them feel this way. I think deep down it is the loss of that time, the realization that maybe it was wasted with all the waiting for it to be perfectly time to be happy.

You can read my thoughts here.

Or check out Katee Sackoff’s (from Longmire) blog and her birthday post from last month! It was eye-opening and perfect.

Enjoy each moment. Look for the happy in every mess you find yourself in. Live now even if you are afraid. Go for it! This is your life.

So when someone asks you “what do you want this year?” Go ahead and tell them, “another one!” And then fill it with everything you’ve got – every passion, every dream, every giggle, every tear, everything! 🙂


  1. Bee Halton

    I think gratitude and mindfulness is a powerful tool in living in the moment and counting your blessings. However, this week it occurred to me that it’s only four years that I’ll be 50 and that just sounds too…. weird 🙂

    • I am closer to 50 than you, my friend! 😊 I am constantly having to stop and think whenever my age comes up. I kinda stopped keeping track some time in my 30s. Age is a state of mind.

      • Bee Halton

        It is indeed. I feel more and more that Simone de Beauvoir is right: your body ages but your mind is still young no matter how feeble your legs and eyes get 🙂 but we will manage the 50 in grace, won’t we????? 🙂

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